Remember...Remember...

• In the beginning were the words and the words made the world. I am the words. The words are everything. Where the words end the world ends. You cannot go forward in the absence of space.
  Tags: Talos
  Date: 5.6.2023, 07:49:51
• It's so safe to play along Little soldiers in a row Falling in and out of love Something sweet to throw away I want something good to die for To make it beautiful to live. I want a new mistake, lose is more than hesitate. Do you believe it in your head?
  Tags: QOSA
  Date: 5.6.2023, 19:56:08
• How neatly a cat sleeps, sleeps with its paws and its posture, sleeps with its wicked claws, and with its unfeeling blood, sleeps with all the rings- a series of burnt circles- which have formed the odd geology of its sand-colored tail. I should like to sleep like a cat, with all the fur of time, with a tongue rough as flint, with the dry sex of fire; and after speaking to no one, stretch myself over the world, over roofs and landscapes, with a passionate desire to hunt the rats in my dreams. I have seen how the cat asleep would undulate, how the night flowed through it like dark water; and at times, it was going to fall or possibly plunge into the bare deserted snowdrifts. Sometimes it grew so much in sleep like a tiger's great-grandfather, and would leap in the darkness over rooftops, clouds and volcanoes. Sleep, sleep cat of the night, with episcopal ceremony and your stone-carved moustache. Take care of all our dreams; control the obscurity of our slumbering prowess with your relentless heart and the great ruff of your tail
  Tags: Neruda
  Date: 6.6.2023, 18:51:40
• When life repeats itself, personal historical recurrence... Taking lessons and moving on turns into a tragedy, tragedy turns into a habit. Everything on earth repeats itself, what is the difference of each moment when it is a part of the same circle. Each footprint comes next to another, there is no unique path. The freedom of repetition. The will of digging a perfect circle by passing it through infinite times until it gets deep enough to get away when you wake up and see the pattern. All these pieces bringing you there, seem one of a kind. At the end they form the same tragedy on the same ground. This cage you choose, is going to lead you and you will feed it with your own hands.
  Tags:
  Date: 6.6.2023, 22:25:26
• Laughter of the week: https://youtu.be/Cg-pnGFbwMQ
  Tags: funny, video
  Date: 9.6.2023, 11:00:51
• I am jogging in the forest. There are old, huge trees standing on both sides of this narrow, unmaintained road. I have to be careful about where I am stepping so as not to fall down. It should have been beautiful here, with these green trees framed by a path that has been almost untouched by any technology created in the last decades. It should have evoked that mysterious instinct to capture the moment. However, this place is chaotic; nothing is in the right place. Even the branches are lying on top of each other in disturbing ways. The grey sky does not help in "feeling the beauty of nature," as they say in the city. I continue jogging, passing by all of this, not thinking much about the contradiction between the expectations and the reality of the "jogging in the forest" experience. Then I see a car on the side of this makeshift road. It's a pretty, black, expensive, new car. It is me, this chaos of green branches, the bumpy road, and this shiny car. It looks like a time machine compared to the spirit of the whole environment. I do not stop; my muscles are moving automatically. Stopping is not an option. I have to pass through this; the sequence of events must take place, and there's absolutely nothing to do about it. Then I remember all the movies, series, and books— all the information absorbed by my senses comes together and reminds me of that unfortunate moment when joggers get killed simply because they witness something they shouldn't have. And there is only one solution to this problem, and it is not good news for the jogger. In this story, I am that poor jogger. Then I recall those scenarios where the unlucky one is blind or deaf. Those scenarios end up with the criminals yelling at each other, "She was blind, man! You didn't have to do this!" Those joggers who place a burden of guilt on the criminals' shoulders… The martyrs who create a question mark in the criminals' minds about their actions, maybe even dragging them into an existential crisis... If you were an observer of this happening, it would make you feel closer to the criminal and the victim simultaneously. You would feel the criminals' pain because, if you are not a psycho, you would feel similar to how they feel. You would feel closer to the victim because you find meaning in their death. They are not just one person crushed in the forest anymore; they are part of a bigger picture that leads a criminal person, or even better, a cluster of them, into a confused mindset about their harmful actions. I am running, and there is no one in the car... They must be conducting their dirty business in the deep forest. I am thinking though, I am neither blind nor deaf. If I get the shot, they will not feel confused. They will not be haunted by their conscience, telling them what they did was a terrible mistake that they have to live with. My death will not follow them while they are visiting their grandmother or hugging their kids. They will simply look at me and think, "Glad we noticed this b.* and took care of her!" I am laughing now… And running... A bit faster...
  Tags: useless thoughts
  Date: 10.6.2023, 15:38:44
• So Kandinsky had synesthesia! Such a surprise:) I met with Kandinsky in my early twenties. Shortly after, his late paintings were hanging on my wall. I read a small book about his life, his style. I find it fascinating how they move your soul, change your mood, how chaotically harmonic all those colors and shapes. I knew he was mused by the music, but I didn’t know that he had a secret power to use while he was „translating“ one form to another. Then I am thinking, could it be an ability to learn? Many talents can be learned to a certain level. Some people have definitely a better understanding about how to use shapes and colors. There are math geniuses who can solve challenging problems in their early ages because of their „talent“. But these can be taught and learned as well. I wonder if it is possible to learn how to translate music into painting. At least to a certain level. Of course everyone has their own style at the end, because a painting is not just a physical meeting point for some colors. But wouldn’t it be possible to get a bit of that feeling? Melissa McCracken, who paints songs from Jimi Hendrix, David Bowie, John Lennon says about music „It flows in a mixture of hues, textures, and movements, shifting as if it were a vital and intentional element of each song.“ She says her brain is cross wired and with this she can connect the numbers, letters and music with colors. Can our brain be trained to create this connection? And another question: Do all these painters with synesthesia having the same sense for each color? Is the sound of each color same for all of them?
  Tags: synesthesia, painting, surprise surprise
  Date: 12.6.2023, 13:02:39
• Mental liquidity:) Should mention density! Hard to keep a balance between „having no-backbone“ and „being stubborn“.
  Tags: https://collabfund.com/blog/mental-liquidity/
  Date: 12.6.2023, 17:17:07
• Wait, I’m not done on synesthesia:) For sure there are many questions to ask for people who do not have that „brain-malfunction“. Yes it is supposed to be a malfunction. It sounds weird, right? It sounds like a gift more than something… wrong. But let’s start with here: What do they hear when they look at nature? Trees, clouds, blue sky, flowers… Is it symphonic? Is there a basic melody of nature? Is there something with harmony filling the ears? And let’s talk about the cities. What do they hear when they look at those buildings, cars, roads…? Do they hear them? Do they hear their own bathroom? And does everything really sound great?:) Everything has up and downsides on earth. Every creature has its own strength and weaknesses. Can it be a weakness at the end to be able to hear every single color you see?
  Tags: synesthesia, painting, surprise surprise
  Date: 12.6.2023, 20:20:54
• Older Women on the Game: Understanding Digital Game Perspectives from an Ageing Cohort, by Hannah Marston and Sheri Graner-Ray, 2015 .......................Interesting facts from the article * According to the article the average of a female gamer was 29 in 2004 and in 2015 it is 43. I checked ESA for more current information, the latest one was from 2019and according to that the average of female gamers is 34, while for men it is 32. It seems like it is decreasing but men too. Is this because the new joiners are less than man? (These values are for USA, there is a high chance to be able to find demographic of gamers in a global scale. And why did ESA stop publishing the average age with respect to genders?) * According to a research published on 1996 „game concepts for younger audiences designed by males often integrate elements of violence, which in turn became less appealing for females“ So this might have changed. * I like this one very much: About gaming habits of female and male gamers. Seem like male gamers plays games for a minimum of 60 minutes or more per day. „In contrast, female gamers reported have less time, and preferred to play for shorter time periods.“ Of course this affects the choice of game types that they are choosing. But more importantly, „women have smaller chunks of free time than males“. The author of the article assume that this is because „women have to conduct additional day-to-day activities“.!!! This is important. Not just the amount of free time but also how they do have it is shaping their lives and choices. A research about the gender politics of free time would be good. * The choices of men and women: MMO and Simulations are equally common. Men choose strategy and RPG games while women are more into puzzle, music, dance or classic board games. * The article mentions gerontological perspectives on aging. The activity theory conforms a positive relationship between activity and life satisfaction. And decrease of social loss results in a decrease in life satisfaction. It is said that „the most successful aging occurs for those persons who stay active and resist the consequences of changes that equate with losses.“ Although some researchers criticized this theory as being too linear. * The study that has been focused on the article finds out that the older women are seeking games improving their knowledge about different countries, cultures and languages. Also they would like to „take on a role which is not the norm or which is not accessible within the society“ as changing their personality to a character in the game environment. * The article mentions that there is a relationship between feminism and gerontology. Both is trying to build upon mechanism for social change and individual empowerment. And it is also mentioned that there is an increase of feminist gerontology and „this could be due to aging process of feminists themselves.“ This is a fairly old article on this issue. Considering how rapid the gaming industry changes it is necessary to follow up newer studies. If there is some:) The main idea of the authors that it is possible to use games for social engagement, rehabilitation and it has a potential to bridge intergenerational relationships. Implementation of digital games and technology into older peoples life can have positive impacts in many ways such as „in their health and well-being, learning new skills, communication with friends and family, and information seeking“. In a broader meaning to be able to use games to increase the quality of life for older women.
  Tags: gaming, aging, feminism
  Date: 17.6.2023, 17:09:01
• https://teachyourselfcs.com/
  Tags: books, links, cs
  Date: 19.6.2023, 19:36:51
• Long time no see, how are you?
  Tags:
  Date: 12.10.2023, 22:51:34